FEMBOY Gizem from Turkey

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My name is Gizem, I am married and Turkish. We live in Istanbul. Except for the first few years of my marriage, I considered myself a woman for a long time. Personally, I'm like an extremely shy, helpless, and pathetic girl. I'm tired of playing the role of a man towards my wife, both at home and in bed. My wife, Serpil, and I haven't had a quality sexual relationship for a long time; I've never felt like a man, and for months, almost a year, I've been neglecting my wife. I'm very happy in the secret woman's world I've created for myself, but I know my wife is very uncomfortable with this situation. We're constantly arguing; she loudly and insultingly tells me that I'm not a man. I have a weaker, more timid personality than a woman, and I submit to everyone. Concepts of honor and dignity mean little to me. Revealing myself and my partner is very exciting. Except for the early years of my marriage, I had regular, but not very frequent, same-sex relationships, and now I have a female friend who is like me, and we have extremely unusual, secret woman-to-woman relationships.