When I moved to the East Coast for work, I because friend with this chick and eventually she started dating this dude. She invited me over to her house to meet him one night and when I walked in he looked at me like, “Bro you’re way too hot to be friends with her.” And I gave him the exact same look because he was a Tall, Blonde, Ripped, Tatted mechanic and she was older and dumpy. Well him and I became close and they ended up breaking up and he moved in with me. A few days later we were up late watching TV and he asked me if we could watch porn… so I was like sure dude it’s whatever. So I notice him getting nervous trying to pick a good porn, and I was like, “it’s cool man dicks in porn are necessary stop trippin” So he finally picks one we both get hard while watching and he just whips his shit out. It was the biggest thing I’ve ever seen in my life and I was immediately like Welllllp Fuck. The experience was short lived though because I reached over like I was gonna grab it and he came and then got awkward…. That shit lives rent free in my mind now.